Weekend. Its the time of the week I feel like I travel through a time machine and go back to the wonderful days I had with her. Of course, I dream about her every now and then, on what could have been and what could never be. She’ll forever be included in my bedtime stories already, and its something I won’t be able to change…at least for now.

But Friday is her day. Its when she runs on my mind most of the time…and I am thinking, damn! she’s one tired lady the whole day coz she keeps running on my mind (okay, time to laugh now, this is a cheesy joke)

What’s on my mind right now?

I vividly remember how I proposed to her years ago. You see, we were childhood friends. I probably knew her already even before I was able to write my name correctly. She was my fist love, but I wasn’t hers.

One day, on one fleeting moment, I gathered up all my courage and five years worth of feelings to tell her that she means a lot to me (which is an understatement as that single moment, she meant everything to me).

I put everything about me on the line, believing that if it was destined, then how I truly feel would be understood. I wasn’t looking for acceptance, but for her to undestand my stupid heart.

But I wasn’t able to get it thru her the way I wanted it to be. Its amazing how after that my heart was completely empty, like how the tide drifts away in the sea. Everything seemed pointless at that instance.

Nonetheless, you all know what happened. Fate was on my side as that girl years back became my woman after sometime, and a complete stranger some years later.

Although my heart feels heavy every now and then when I think about what we had and what we could never have, I am glad I told her how much she meant to me that fateful day as it was the start of a journey I won’t ever forget.

It may not have ended the way I wanted it, but still I was able to experience my own fairytale, and I will never have to ask myself one day when I am grey and old… “what if?”.

And I realized.

Never be afraid to tell her you love her, say it out loud, right there, right now…. or else, the moment just passes you by